Not A Good Time
Well the title could just apply to life generally at the moment. A classic understatement if ever there was one. I feel that most of us would welcome some definite statements about what the future may hold even if, being realistic, that’s to the effect that the coronavirus situation will take a very long time to resolve and that even experts have no certainties. We aren’t designed for living in limbo. We like a plan even if it’s a long term one. We want to be treated as adults.
All of that applies to couples going through the uncertainties of divorce. It’s very hard to live for any length of time in a state of total unknowing about what the future may hold. It feels very unsafe.
At the same time my mediation clients know that it’s not sensible right now to arrive at any arrangements about what might happen on the sale of the family home for instance. Values, what mortgages may be available, whether they will have a job in 6 months are all unknowns.
So does that mean just parking everything for now?
I don’t think it does. Aside from using mediation to arrive at decisions about what interim arrangements should be both as regards children and finances, progress can be made now so that clients aren’t starting from scratch once real decisions can be made again, whenever that may be.
All the disclosure apart from valuations can be completed. Importantly principles about what a deal may look like can be established. It’s usually the principles of division where the real stumbling blocks arise after all.
So, whilst I would be the first to accept that achieving overall settlement in mediation on long term finances can’t be achieved right now, it definitely is the right time to start the process.
You may not “get there” but you will find that a road map will take shape.
Not A Good Time